{"id":46656,"date":"2025-10-31T17:37:03","date_gmt":"2025-10-31T17:37:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.donbosco.press\/?p=46656"},"modified":"2025-10-31T17:41:50","modified_gmt":"2025-10-31T17:41:50","slug":"let-me-be-alone-i-suffer-too-much-1867","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.donbosco.press\/en\/dreams-of-don-bosco\/let-me-be-alone-i-suffer-too-much-1867\/","title":{"rendered":"Let me be alone; I suffer too much (1867)"},"content":{"rendered":"

The following dream, recounted by Don Bosco to his young people in 1867, begins with a sleepless night during which the Saint reflects on the mystery of the soul. Guided by a luminous presence, he is transported to a suspended palace where he meets a friendly bishop, already deceased, who gives him glimpses into the destiny beyond death. Warnings emerge from their dialogue: the illusory nature of worldly pleasures, the need to dispel the worldly “fog”, the safeguarding of purity, obedience, the avoidance of idleness, prayer, and frequent confession and communion. The vision, both realistic and symbolic, illuminates divine justice and the urgency of preparing for Paradise in the daily Salesian educational journey, making the message of hope and responsibility relevant to every reader.<\/em><\/p>\n

After night prayers that same evening, Don Bosco spoke also to the whole community as follows:<\/p>\n

When I went to bed last night 1 could not fall asleep directly, and so I began thinking about the soul: its nature, mode of existence, structure, activities after its separation from the body, and mobility. I wondered too how we might be able to recognize others after death, since we would all be pure spirits. The more I thought about it, the less I knew.
\nFinally I fell asleep and dreamed that I was on my way to \u2026 (and he named the city<\/em>). After passing through several unknown towns, I suddenly heard someone calling me. He was standing on the shoulder of the road. \u201cCome with me,\u201d he said, \u201cand your wish will be fulfilled.\u201d I obeyed. We moved through space as swiftly as thought, never touching the ground until we got to some place totally unknown to me. High above us stood a magnificent palace. I can\u2019t really say whether it stood on a mountain or on a cloud, but it certainly was inaccessible. No roads led to it and it was far beyond reach.
\n\u201cGo up to that palace,\u201d my guide said.
\n\u201cHow?\u201d I replied. \u201cI have no wings!\u201d
\n\u201cGo up!\u201d he repeated imperiously. Seeing that I did not stir, he added, \u201cDo as I do. Lift your arms as high as you can.\u201d He showed me how, and at once I felt myself lifted into the air like a thin cloud. In no time we reached the palace gates.
\n\u201cWho lives here?\u201d I asked.
\n\u201cGo in and you\u2019ll know. At the end of the hall someone will give you information.\u201d
\nHe disappeared. Left to myself, I went in, walked along a portico, went up a stairway, and entered a truly regal apartment. I passed through spacious halls, richly decorated rooms, and endless corridors at such unearthly speed that I could not even count them. Each glittered with priceless treasures. But what astonished me most was that, although I was going as swiftly as the wind, I never even moved my feet. I was gliding along over what seemed to be a crystal floor without ever touching it. Finally I came to a door at the end of a corridor that opened into another hall even more magnificent than all the others. At the far end, a bishop sat majestically in an imposing armchair, apparently awaiting somebody. I approached respectfully and was extremely surprised to recognize him as a dear friend of mine \u2014 Bishop . . . of. . . (Don Bosco mentioned his name<\/em>) who died two years ago. He did not seem to be in pain. He looked healthy and friendly and was indescribably handsome.
\n\u201cYour Excellency!\u201d I exclaimed with great joy. \u201cIs it really you?\u201d
\n\u201cCan\u2019t you see?\u201d the bishop replied.
\n\u201cBut how? Are you still living? I thought you were dead.\u201d
\n\u201cI am<\/em> dead.\u201d
\n\u201cHow can it be? You look wonderful! If you are still alive, please say so or we\u2019ll have a problem. At [Cuneo] another bishop 3 has already taken your place. How are we going to settle this?\u201d
\n\u201cDon\u2019t worry! I am<\/em> dead.\u201d
\n\u201cThat\u2019s good! It would hardly do to have two bishops on the same chair.\u201d
\n\u201cI understand. And how about you, Don Bosco? Are you dead or alive?\u201d
\n\u201cI am alive. Can\u2019t you see I am here in body and soul?\u201d
\n\u201cBodies aren\u2019t allowed here.\u201d
\n\u201cBut I am<\/em> here in my body.
\n\u201cYou think<\/em> you are. …\u201d
\nAt this point I fired off a lot of questions which went unanswered. \u201cHow can it be that I, still living, am here with you who are dead?\u201d I kept asking. Fearing that the bishop might vanish, I begged him, \u201cPlease, Your Excellency, do not leave me. There are many things I want to ask you.\u201d
\n\u201cRelax,\u201d he said. \u201cI won\u2019t run away. What do you want to know?\u201d
\n\u201cAre you saved?\u201d
\n\u201cLook at me! See how vigorous, ruddy, and radiant I am.\u201d Indeed his whole appearance gave a well-founded hope that he was saved. Nonetheless, I insisted: \u201cPlease give me a straight answer. Are you saved or not?\u201d
\n\u201cYes, I am in a place of salvation.\u201d
\n\u201cAre you in heaven or in purgatory?\u201d
\n\u201cI am in a place of salvation, but I have not yet seen God. I still need your prayers.\u201d
\n\u201cHow long must you yet stay in purgatory?\u201d
\n\u201cThis will tell you,\u201d he said, handing me a paper. I examined it attentively but found nothing on it.
\n\u201cThere is no writing at all on it,\u201d I replied.
\n\u201cLook carefully,\u201d he insisted.
\n\u201cI am looking,\u201d I countered, \u201cbut I still can\u2019t see any writing.\u201d
\n\u201cLook again.\u201d
\n\u201cI only see multicolored floral designs but no writing whatever.\u201d
\n\u201cThere are numerals.\u201d
\n\u201cI don\u2019t see any!\u201d
\nThe bishop peered at the paper I was holding. \u201cNo wonder you don\u2019t see any. Turn the paper upside down.\u201d I complied and examined the paper even more closely from all angles, but to no avail. The only thing I could make out were floral twists and whorls resembling the figure.
\n\u201cDo you know why you must turn the paper upside down in order to read it? It is because God\u2019s judgments are different from the world\u2019s. What men hold as wisdom is foolishness in God\u2019s sight.\u201d
\nNot daring to press for a clearer explanation, I just said, \u201cPlease, Bishop, do not leave me yet. I have more questions.\u201d
\n\u201cGo on. I\u2019m listening.\u201d
\n\u201cWill I be saved?\u201d
\n\u201cYou must hope.\u201d
\n\u201cPlease don\u2019t keep me in suspense. Tell me straight.\u201d
\n\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d
\n\u201cAt least tell me if I am in the state of grace.\u201d
\n\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d
\n\u201cWill my boys be saved?\u201d
\n\u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d
\n\u201cTell me, please, I beg you.\u201d
\n\u201cYou have studied theology and you can answer that question yourself.\u201d
\n\u201cI can\u2019t believe it. Here you are in a place of salvation and you don\u2019t know these things?\u201d
\n\u201cIt\u2019s like this: God reveals these things to whomsoever He wishes. If He wants this knowledge to be imparted to anyone, He gives the necessary command or permission. Otherwise, no one can reveal these things to the living.\u201d
\nEndless questions kept popping up in my mind and I quickly voiced them, fearing that the bishop might disappear.
\n\u201cWill you now give me a message for my boys?\u201d
\n\u201cYou know as well as I what they must do. The Church, the Gospel, and the rest of the Scriptures are clear enough. Tell your boys to save their souls because that\u2019s all that matters. The rest counts for nothing.\u201d
\n\u201cWe know we must save our souls. But how shall we go about it? Tell me something special that may remind us of you. I shall repeat it to my boys in your name.\u201d
\n\u201cTell them to be good and obedient.\u201d
\n\u201cThey know that.\u201d
\n\u201cTell them to be modest and to pray.\u201d
\n\u201cPlease be more specific!\u201d
\n\u201cTell them to go to confession often and to make worthy Communions.\u201d
\n\u201cSomething more specific yet.\u201d
\n\u201cWell, then, tell them this. Tell them that there is fog before their eyes. If they are aware of it, it\u2019s a good sign. Let them dispel it.\u201d
\n\u201cWhat does this fog symbolize?\u201d
\n\u201cThe things of the world which prevent them from seeing the things of heaven as they really are.\u201d
\n\u201c And what must they do to dispel this fog?\u201d
\n\u201cThey must see the world as it really is. \u2018The whole world is under the evil one.\u2019 [1 John 5, 19] Only then will they save their souls. They should not let themselves be deceived by appearances. Believing that worldly pleasures, amusements, and friendships will make them happy, the young long for them, while they should rather keep in mind that all is vanity and affliction of spirit. Let them form the habit to judge matters of the world not by their appearances, but as they really are.\u201d
\n\u201cAnd what mainly causes this fog?\u201d
\n\u201cImmodesty and impurity, a sin which, like a murky cloud, prevents youngsters from seeing the abyss toward which they are heading. Tell them to guard jealously the virtue of purity. It is the virtue that shines brightest in heaven. \u2018The pure shall flourish like the lily.\u2019 \u201d [Is. 35, 1]
\n\u201cHow is it to be safeguarded? Tell me and I\u2019ll repeat it to my dear boys in your name.\u201d
\n\u201cFour things: flight from worldly things, obedience, avoiding idleness, and prayer.\u201d
\n\u201cWhat else?\u201d
\n\u201cPrayer, avoiding idleness, obedience, and flight from worldly things.\u201d
\n\u201cAnything else?\u201d
\n\u201cObedience, flight from worldly things, prayer, and avoiding idleness. Insist on these things. They are enough.\u201d
\nI wanted to ask other questions, but I couldn\u2019t think of any at the moment. Besides, being in such a hurry to tell you these things, I dashed out and with the speed of wind found myself at the Oratory gate. There I suddenly felt a sense of regret, thinking: Why did I not stay longer with the bishop? I could have learned many more things. I really blundered in letting such a good chance slip by<\/em>. I immediately dashed back with my former speed but with a nagging fear of no longer finding the bishop. Luckily he was still there\u2014but what a change! He was lying in bed, as white as a ghost, with tears welling in his eyes. He was dying. A slight heaving of his chest was the only sign of life.
\nI stooped over him in utter shock. \u201cYour Excellency, what happened?\u201d
\n\u201cLeave me alone,\u201d he moaned.
\n\u201cI have many more things to ask you.\u201d
\n\u201cLeave me alone! I am in terrible pain.\u201d
\n\u201cCan I help you?\u201d
\n\u201cPray for me and let me go.\u201d
\n\u201cGo where?\u201d
\n\u201cWhere God is leading me.\u201d
\n\u201cBut where? Please tell me.\u201d
\n\u201cI am in too much pain! Leave me alone!\u201d
\n\u201cAt least tell me what I can do for you,\u201d I repeated.
\n\u201cPray!\u201d
\n\u201cHave you any messages? Anything you want me to tell your successor?\u201d
\n\u201cTell him this and this. . . .\u201d However, since the things he told me are not for you, my dear boys, I will leave them out. The bishop then gave me other confidential messages. (Don Bosco did not reveal them. They seem to have been admonitions or measures to be taken for the good of that diocese<\/em>.)
\n\u201cAnything else?\u201d I asked.
\n\u201cTell your boys that they have always been very dear to me. I prayed for them during my life and still do. Let them now pray for me.\u201d
\n\u201cI will surely tell them,\u201d I replied, \u201cand we will begin at once to offer suffrages for you. Please remember us as soon as you reach heaven.\u201d
\nThe bishop meanwhile seemed to be suffering even more. It was heartrending to see him in such painful agony.
\n\u201cLeave me,\u201d he repeated. \u201cLet me go where God calls me.\u201d
\n\u201cBishop! Bishop!\u201d I kept repeating, filled with inexpressible pity.
\n\u201cLet me be, let me be!\u201d He seemed to be breathing his last while an invisible force pulled him out of sight into an inner part of the palace.
\nFrightened and deeply moved, I turned to get back to the Oratory, but in so doing I bumped my knee into something and woke up in bed. ‘
\nAs you see, my dears boys, this is a dream like many others. What concerns you needs no explanation. It has taught me a lot about the soul and purgatory. Things I had never before been able to grasp became so clear that I shall never forget them.
\nPerhaps in this two-part dream Don Bosco meant to depict the state of grace of the souls in purgatory and their expiatory sufferings. He did not comment on the state of that good bishop.
\nSome time later, relying on his trust in us, we asked him if he had delivered the bishop\u2019s messages. \u201cYes,\u201d he replied. \u201cI did!\u201d
\nWe will further remark that the dream, as recorded above, omits a detail that we remember but perhaps seemed unclear or unimportant at that time. At a certain point in the dream Don Bosco asked how much longer he would live. In reply the bishop handed him a paper full of scribbles and whorls interwoven into the figure 8, but he offered no explanations. Did these figures point to 1888 [the year of Don Bosco\u2019s death]?
\n(MB ITVIII, 853-859 \/ MB EN VIII, 368-373)<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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